This place is full of Chinese people. That’s a good sign.

Both of the above statements are true of China Sea. This legendary restaurant opposite the clock tower roundabout on Deira’s Maktoum Street attracts a steady stream of Chinese customers, who are no doubt grateful for its authenticity, not to mention its faithfully rendered Chinese food.


It also draws in a fair smattering of non-Chinese people, who perhaps also ache for a taste of real Chinese food at a price that won’t stop their hearts before the grease on the spring rolls does.


However, in an attempt to get more people through the door, the management have erected some large signs outside, which even the most cynical hater of Chinese food cannot fail to be enchanted by.


It reads exactly as follows:


"Good News


Big promotion - - 20 % discount for 68 days both in China Sea and China Wind restaurant. Along with that China Sea will reopen the buffet for chafing dish for all the people who love the hot pot so much. buffet 78dhs/person also make 20 % discount!


Buffet has more than hundred ingredients, the changes in style, meticulous preparation and the unique taste. Wish you have a good luck when you have that. The food you can have such as delicious small size lobster, all set of fish-ball we serve before, prawns, seafood, beef, lamb, chicken, staple food, seasonal vegetable, fruit, drink, traditional special grill etc.


Promises by all the employee from China Sea and China Wind restaurant:


Excellent service every day, Cannily make every meal!


Don’t miss the chance! Hurry up! Come on!"


I’m right there, just wait a moment while I stop sniggering. Ok, I’ll admit China Sea’s English just about has the edge on my Mandarin Chinese. But what a snappy sign to yank those busy passersby off the street and through the door. That chafing dish sounds painful, too. Wish you have a good luck when you have that.


For far better Chinese restaurant English howlers, go here